On Sophistication

The models pulled out a mommy load of Tupperware, except instead of food they were filled with jewelry, lipsticks, glosses, shadows and other beauty necessities for the 20-something. While they fumbled through the wardrobes they brought – unaware that my husband and I had a very different shoot in mind than the one which needed their skimpy thongs or bras – I went through their color selections. Their choices looked like they raided a Polish drugstore in a one-minute grab all contest. Price doesn’t justify itself as a compromise for the right look.

What struck me as funny was that in my twenties I also had a very large make up collection, filled with anything that was on sale because the color wasn’t as important as the price. Plus, being a teen in the 80’s, eyes were about exploring with color, lots of it. I used to lock myself in the bathroom and play with my makeup. I’d do a different look everyday, most of which in hindsight made me look like a clown trying to glamorize her look. I still remember my proudest moment when I achieved the look Kim Alexis had in a makeup ad in a Cosmo: purple, gold, black, blue and perhaps another color blended together on the eye lids – with big hair. I’m so glad those days are gone, not the makeup craze but the youthful bliss of ignorance.

Very unexpectedly I’ve had a run-in with aging. Being that several years ago I wrote about how great and all full of wisdom it was, I was a bit perplexed that I was even beginning to have an issue with it. I don’t have wrinkles yet and recently I was given two superb compliments. One came from a friend who showed my picture and the other person thought I was in my late 20’s. Yipee! The other was when a young guy called me a MILF (mothers I’d like to fuck) Woo hoo!! I found that to be quite a compliment actually. The issue however hasn’t been as much physical aging as it has been facing the fact that I’ve hit some unusual maturity marker and this position is very powerful and enlightening. Simultaneously, they’re unknown waters that are a bit cold for my liking.

Emerging from the dark side recently, I saw that I had been on a slight search to change my look to go along with the change of self. Life just goes by so quickly and one day you need to modernize and become on the outside what you’ve become on the inside. I’d been so busy working on the inside that I realized up until about October I hadn’t bought new clothes or make up in about two years! I’m a guy’s dream when shopping. Get in, find what you were looking for and get out as quickly as possible.

For a bit now my best friend has taken me into her stylish hands. We started at the MAC counter and I can’t go back to drugstore make up ever again. In fact, I ended up using my makeup to create the look for the models in the last photo shoot my husband photographed. I was thrilled I thought ahead because so many European models we use – all of which are in their early 20’s – are stuck in the era of pink lipsticks and sky blue eye shadows. It may be that they’re exploring with color as I did in their age but for a sophisticated look, my suggestion is to leave the drugstore colors to the teens.

Sophistication takes up less space too. Rather than Tupperware loads of makeup that just gets dirty and unused, sophisticated makeup bags contain only what is needed. A few basic shadow colors, maybe a couple colors for pizzazz, natural lipstick and gloss, a red for evening wear, mascara, foundation, Benefit Lemon Aid, Benetint blush and a few good brushes. Of course one can still play but things get simpler when maturity and sophistication emerge.

I’ve noticed this with my wardrobe too. Loosing 20 lbs I finally fit into all of my pre-baby clothes but since they were old anyway, now they’re totally out of fashion. Rather than waiting until I loose the other ten pounds to be where I want, I’ve bought a few simple pieces that are carrying me though the weight transition and when I hit my target weight I’ll go shop happy. In the meantime, I’m flipping through magazines and cutting out looks that define who I’ve become and I’m open minded to what I’m attracted to. It turns out I’m much more feminine then I thought. The feminist influence of the 80’s power woman has softened. It’s nice being feminine and wise. Maybe that’s how you get the privilege of being called a MILF!

I told my husband last night I wanted him to take new portraits of me for my website since the past several years have finally produced a completion of sorts of what I’ve become as a result of my journey into the erotic.

“You’ve changed again,” he said.

“Yep and I’m about to find out just how much” thanks to all the people who have given me support through the chaos.

Namaste,
Tatiana von Tauber
www.vontauber.com